sirenspull ic contact;

[payback]

[a long pause, here. and then she kind of coughs a bit.] - ah, it's working?

[...]

...Um, yes... hello. [clears her throat.] This is Asano Rin. You can leave a message if you need.

Comments

[allucinator]

[He laughs more genuinely this time.]

Can't, didn't I tell you? Nothin' works on me-- no drugs, no alcohol, nothin'.

[payback.livejournal.com]

... I hadn't realized.

Well, what else would you think he could do?

[allucinator]

Christ, I don't know. Fish em out and put em in a jar-- that's what they do in Sirius' world.

[payback.livejournal.com]

Why can't he do that for you?

[allucinator]

He don't have the-- the technology or somethin'. I don't know.

[A pause.]

He put a spell on me once. Tried to make me remember all those we'd lost in Edelweiss. It didn't work, but-- Christ. He would do anythin' for me-- for us-- if he thought it'd help.

[payback.livejournal.com]

... I still don't think you should ask Madara for that. Even if it's a relief - it's not real. And regardless of what we think of him, we shouldn't rely on him too much.

[allucinator]

[He glances over at her.]

If he offered, would you take it? No strings attached, nothin'-- just a way to forget when you wanted.

[payback.livejournal.com]

... It wouldn't be real. And Jack, how d'you know you could choose when you wanted and when you didn't, finally? Or if he'd give it back when you wanted? He has a mind of his own too, and his own motivations.

[allucinator]

That's not the point right now. If you could, if you knew it'd be safe, would you?

[payback.livejournal.com]

... I don't know. Maybe.

[allucinator]

You could be the person you were before. No madness, no fears, no paranoia every time you stepped outta your door . . .

[payback.livejournal.com]

Jack, listen, I messed up. You shouldn't think that you'll get it all the way you want it, if you ask him for too much.

[allucinator]

What do you mean, messed up?

[payback.livejournal.com]

... [Rin pulls away from him a little and curls up with her knees to her chest and her forehead on her knees. Muffled, slightly:]

You remember when those girls picked on me at school?

[allucinator]

Yeah.

[payback.livejournal.com]

I posted to the NV because I needed someone to pick me up... well, Madara came and signed me out. And we walked, and we talked, and I was so angry... I made something bad happen to those girls. He did it because I asked him to.

[allucinator]

[A pause.]

How bad?

[payback.livejournal.com]

[She sits up a bit, lifting her eyes to glare at him a bit - not angry at him, exactly. Just, brimming a bit with misdirected, uncertain agitation.]

I never asked exactly what he did and he didn't tell me. I said I wanted them to leave me alone, and right after that, they did - they were still at school and everything.

Well, I'm not going back next year, and I asked him to take it off them because it was a stupid thing. It was stupid and selfish and something I should have dealt with in the first place, with my fists if I had to. And I'm not proud of myself for doing it. And he said he did, but... it took some arguing.

[allucinator]

Why, what was his reasonin'?

[payback.livejournal.com]

He said he couldn't forgive someone who had made me suffer that much easily.

[allucinator]

Not really his decision to make, is it?

[payback.livejournal.com]

Wouldn't you think? But it's like I said: he has a mind of his own. And we don't know everything that goes through it...

[allucinator]

I'd give a lot to know, even for a day. He wasn't even upset about Sasuke, for crissake!

[payback.livejournal.com]

[She flops against him abruptly, closing her eyes and seeming to melt against him: exhausted.]

Do you think if I thought he could be trusted, all the way, really, that I wouldn't? I'm so tired... he can take care of pretty much anything. But even if you want to you shouldn't rely on anyone too much. No matter how trustworthy they are. Because you never know what can happen here... when everything can break apart. People disappear without a trace...

[allucinator]

[He holds her. For a minute he's silent, and then:]

I know what you mean. But . . . I trust Sirius with anythin'. Everythin'.