[OOC - Crit post]

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Hey. =) This is a crit post. I'm sure you know how it works. If Rin's characterization is bugging you, or if my rp style is getting on your nerves, please yell at me here. Anonymous enabled and all that jazz.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

testing anonymous test test test.

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from here. (http://silvinscorner.awardspace.com/icontable/)

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Every morning the cough, the bellows in your chest
forcing out what drained in the night. Every morning your
finger in your mouth scooping phlegm out the
back of your throat in dense yellow pellets
like pieces of corn.

What should I do with you? Us two
fluent in the language of desire. Every morning
you drink the honey from the comb I hold
over your lips. What else have I fed you? What else
could I do? In some words:

Poached egg,
Pork Belly,
Acorns, apples and apricots,
Pink salmon,
Potatoes and garlic.
Amber-smoke honey.

Every night moonlight silking in the window,
every morning my finger in your throat, scraping
out the waste. What can
I do? Every morning I want to say, don't go.

I didn't feed you all those pomegranate seeds
for no reason,
did I?

[(Anonymous)]

you are fantastic :) I never thought I'd see anyone play from this canon!

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What a pleasant surprise, anon! Thank you so much. ♥

[(Anonymous)]

it's no problem! you are really an amazing rin, you have her speech pattern and personality down to a t.

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I hope we get to play together, anon. (:

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Sushiflop